Yes you did it. You let yourself or someone you care about down. You messed up just when you thought you got it all perfect and correct. That is because it is only natural to make mistakes in life and almost everybody out there has made one or two horrendous mistakes. Anyway, you have to, at some point, allow the sun to shine into your life again by forgiving yourself as well as accept past events as part of your story. Has it been challenging for you to do that at times? If yes then this might interest you.
As humans it sometimes becomes a convention for many to hold on to past mistakes long after they occurred. At least for me I did until I knew what I know now. The reality is that you cannot change what has happened. However, carrying around a sense of blame or guilt for something that has happened in the past is bad for the future. Forgiving ourselves does not justify what we have done, and it is not a sign of weakness. It is a choice that takes courage and strength, and it gives us the opportunity to become an overcomer rather than remaining a victim of our own scorn. I will agree with you if you say “it’s sometimes easy to say, but so much harder to actually do.” But it is possible.
Life is full of choices and every choice we make will either take us in a positive, life-giving direction or rob us of the opportunity to be a life-giving individual. Forgiving yourself is not about forgetting. It is about letting go of what you are holding against yourself so that you can move on with your career, talent, education and life.
Too often, we invest so much time and emotion in the present to punish ourselves for past mistakes. Forgiveness is a process. It does not happen overnight and the process might be different for everyone. It also allows you to live in the present instead of the past, which means that you can move into the future with a renewed sense of purpose focused on change, improvement, and building on experience rather than being held back by past hurts.
The past may have all contributed to making you who you are but it does not define you. I am yet to meet anyone one who has never made mistakes in life. Learn from your mistakes, forgive yourself and move on. Forgiveness may be a tough quality to develop yet it is imperative for the move.
“Forgiveness is a tool with which we face what we’ve done in the past, acknowledge our mistakes, and move on,” Dr. Fred Luskin
As you move on, you might need to avoid people who bring back the past for you in a negative way; people who push your buttons, devalue or belittle you, and who are thoughtless about your vulnerabilities are best left behind New York Times best-selling author and speaker Mandy Hale puts it this way “people who judge you by your past don’t belong in your present”.
However, if you continue to have difficulties with self-forgiveness, suffer from shame, guilt or still feeling bad about yourself due to past mistakes I will suggest it might be it helpful to see a counselor. We must recognize that no one is beyond the grasp of God’s grace and redemption. You can become a better you by letting the sun of self-forgiveness shine into your life again.